leaning on Him

Somedays I am a leader. Somedays I follow. Today I am a leaner. Today I am leaning on The Lord Almighty. To day He will be my portion, my strength. He is my courage, my hope. In less then an hour I am meeting with my Dr. to find out the result to my tests. I have no fear, or anxiety. but I am resting in the Lord. Praying and trusting. Expecting answers. I want answers. I want to know what is wrong with me so we can fix it. Lord I am not coming to asking WHY. Instead I come before your throne, sitting and listening... looking for the WHAT. What do you want to show me through this. What do you want to use me for. What are you trying to show me. How can I bring you glory in and through this ordeal. I am sick. I am not myself and I am leaning on you for the What. Hear me oh Lord. I don't want to just take the pain the meds and call it good. I want to weed out the issue and fix it. I want me health and my life back. Only you can bring me these results and I am trusting in you Lord. Eucharisteo is a greek word meaning grace, thanksgiving and joy. Lord I find my Eucharisteo in you. The Eucharisteo PRECEDES the miracle. So Lord I thank you. I thank you Lord for your power, you plan and your perfect will for my life. I praise you Lord that you have me and my life and my family in your mighty hands. I thank you God for your faithfulness. I praise you God for answers I am going to get from the Dr. today. I thank you that you already know what he is going to say, and you already know the outcome. I don't have to worry, I don't have to questions if everything will be OK because I am resting in you Lord. I am your child and you have great plans for me. Your plan for me is Holy and perfect. I rest in you. I find peace and strength in your covering. I thank you God that you are enough. God I lay down my emptiness and ask you to make it full. I lay down my pain my discomfort praising you that your plan and your desire is to make me whole. I am leaning on you Lord. I thank you that will you will NOT let me fall. Lord I am yours. I love you. Love Traci

The beginning

It is time for change. After years of bed rest from my scary and difficult pregnancies, I have become a different person. I don't have the desire to exercise and eating has become merely for pleasure. Most days you can finding me sitting on my butt. BUT not anymore. Tomorrow I begin an 8 day challenge to lose weight and get my active healthy fun loving lifestyle back!!! Naturally I can hardly wait! Here is a great photo that you can totally see the weight in my face. It is embarrassing and time for a change. I am a Mom, but I do not have to look like most of them... so I am taking the challenge and changing my body appearance, inside and out. I will post inches lost and photos so I can see the change. AND if you are interested join me. You can go to www.xyngular.com/tkenitzer GLADLY walk you through menu plans and products if you have any questions at all. Any one can do this and at any age or any weight. It has many healing properties too, my personal family members have been healed from fibromyalgia high blood sugars and migraines. Call me or facebook me with any questions... LETS loose the weight together and FOREVER! 949-439-2365 First measurements and photos to come .....

Revelations

This Christmas season was filled with revelations. I wish that I would have written more of them down, there were THAT many. But here is one I thankfully caught a photo of... So we had a friend over the other night. We were catching up and she was filling us in. She had left her very successful job making plenty of money and even enjoyed her work very much, to fill a place at her church. She is making over half less then what she was making before and has had to dramatically change her lifestyle because of it... (she has done so with nothing but joy as you can see it all over her face) as she explained her daily tasks of getting up early daily to pray over others to have devotions and time in the word daily. I was very happy for her, and also wanted that for myself, but since I choose to become a mother THAT was the season that I was in. Not mothering over other children. So I felt a bit sad in my heart that I couldn't be doing that too! Just like God, a few days later I finally had time and a desire to sit down and figure out Paisley's new and official home school curriculum. I locked myself in my room and was in there for over 8hrs! After I put all the binders together (which was NO small task) next I began learning how to understand  the daily lessons. How to read them how to prepare to teach them and how to teach them. Next I had to learn so that I could teach it to Paisley! Well after I was a few hours into it... I laughed out loud when I had a revelation. I heard the Lords voice ask me "What are YOU doing RIGHT now... is this not exactly what you were wanting?" As I looked around I had two Bibles out (two different versions for very clear understanding for ALL of the questions I know Paisley will be asking.) I had Bible lessons and every other lesson that all come directly out of scripture! I wasn't getting paid in monetary values but I am surely storing up my blessing IN heaven! I began this whole time of preparation on my knees in prayer, (this is personal but I am documenting it for my benefit for the future as I will be preparing these lessons EACH day and not just this once) I prayed out loud with my hands cupped open to the Lord, as a symbol of me giving myself and all my short comings to Him. It was also a symbol of me being open to accept all that I was going to need from Him to carry out this task successfully. Then Throughout the prayer the Holy Spirit came over me, and I began singing, I don't know what I sang, it was a new song. NOT one that I had heard before, but one the Holy Spirit put in me. As I finished singing the song I can't explain how I felt physically, emotionally and mentally. But full and at peace touch the surface! So Lord I want to thank you for being my everything. For using me to teach love and serve the two precious gifts you so specifically placed in our care. I thank you for the revelations, I hold them dear to my heart. I document them as a reminder in the hard times. When I am feeling inadequate to teach my daughter, and not good enough to selflessly love and serve my family. God YOU are enough. You are my portion. I am your daughter. I am special. I am important. You have called me to a purpose and in your strength, through your guidance I will march firmly ahead. Carry me when I need it. Fill me when I am empty. Wipe my tears when I cry and please oh please pick me up when I fall! I thank you Lord for your provisions. For your blessings and for your miracles. Thank you for the desire to leave MY highly successful job to stay at home and raise Paisley and Kaiser. Thank you for providing so abundantly along the way. Thank you for always making a way, even when there seemed to be no way. Praise you Lord for all that you have brought me through over the last 6 years. I started SO low, SO depressed and even more lonely. But I praise you God that I always have YOU. You are all I need, you will supply the rest, overly and abundantly because that is how much you love me. Jesus I love you. Thank you for loving me so deeply. Amen.